I have recently heard from the Director of Vocations, and the process is moving forward. If all goes as I hope, then soon, I will travel to Mount Alvernia Friary in upstate NY to have an interview with my Order's Brotherhood Council.
If the interview flows in the direction of joining with the Brothers, I will be invited to come next summer to begin a more intentional part of my journey along with the Brothers of St. Gregory. Then
I will make my Postulant vows before the high altar in the Church of the Stigmata.
After being admitted to the Postulancy, I would then follow a prescribed course of study, Spiritual counsel, required self-examination and testing which lasts a minimum of one year (could and often does, go longer).
Part of me sings with joy, but there is another part that fears and draws back. My life will change, and much like a marriage, I will give myself over to others, no longer will I be the supposed captain of my soul. (Isn't control just an illusion anyway?)
Poverty..Chastity...Obedience. Which will be the hardest? If I know me, and I do, I suspect the Obedience.
As I hold all this in my heart, I hear the words of Br. Ron Fender, who as a Novice wrote this:
I never dreamed that the vow of poverty could enrich my life so abundantly. I never imagined that the vow of chastity would allow me to love so many and with such passion. I never thought that the vow of obedience would grant me such freedom.
Christe Fili Dei vivi, miserere nobis
(Christ, Son of the living God, have mercy upon me)
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